— Comrade Stalin, in America, it takes two years to develop and test a new fighter aircraft…
— Are you an American? Finish the work by spring.
(From the dialogue between Stalin and aircraft designer Yakovlev as recounted by Viktor Suvorov)
It seems that investors of the German startup Helsing and Spotify founder Daniel Ek should ask the same question.
By January 2026, it became clear: the Western approach of 'war as a business project' has broken against Ukrainian black soil.
While Berlin was happily reporting on the transfer of another batch of 'smart' drones Helsing HX-2, a cold shower happened at the 'zero'...
According to internal reports from operators of the 414th separate regiment of strike unmanned aerial systems (the famous 'Madyar Birds') and units of the GUR who tested these boards in the South, Helsing was recognized as a 'raw product for greenhouse conditions.' The main complaint was the system's inability to operate in Ukrainian winter conditions and dense electronic warfare. The military refused mass use of HX-2, sending them for 'deep software refinement.'
Why did the 'Wunderwaffe' turn into a pumpkin?
Take off?
The start from the catapult (apron) became the first bright 'fuckup'. Due to miscalculations in the inertial system, the drone simply 'cannot handle' the sharp acceleration at launch. According to tests in the Mykolaiv region, only 20% of launches were successful. The rest involved burying expensive plastic in the mud within seconds.
AI-blindness
The artificial intelligence of Helsing was trained on contrasting landscapes of Bavaria. In the January fog and smoke of Donbas, where everything around is a gray mess, the drone's 'vision' produces neurohallucinations. It loses orientation, starts to circle, and eventually falls, never having 'seen' the target.
The price of absurdity
The economics of war is a highly precise science. Let's simply compare what is not more effective, but more efficient?
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Helsing HX-2: about $45,000 per unit.
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FPV-stack on machine vision (ours): up to $1,200.
For the price of one glitchy 'German,' we can assemble 40 strike drones that actually destroy armor, rather than search for themselves in the fog.
Cheaper, more reliable, in mass
While the West was 'pitching' startups, we and the enemy launched into serial production and mass introduced more affordable, reliable, and practical analogs into the troops. Here are a few examples that were developed (or modified) with consideration of the demands of war 4.0:
Ukraine
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UAS 'Vikhor-II' (and similar from Brave1): Ukraine scaled the production of affordable drones with automatic target capture (Simple Target Tracking). This is not 'high AI,' but simple mathematics that allows the drone to reach its target even if communication breaks off 200 meters away. The price is cheap, and they are operational in every other unit.
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Repeater drones with fiber optics: Mass market entry of 'on a spool' drones (control via a thin wire). Electronic warfare is powerless against them, and the image is 4K without a single interference.
Russia
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Updated 'Lancet-3' (version 'Product-53'): The Russians launched a mass series of drones operating in swarms. They also have an image analyzer that recognizes vehicles without operator involvement. This is a direct competitor to Helsing, only it actually flies and costs several times less.
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'Ovod-S': Cheap FPV with 'machine vision,' which they are already producing in thousands every month.
List of 'golden garbage' for comparison
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Switchblade 300 (USA): $52,000. Does not even penetrate old BMPs. In fact, it has been removed from service due to inefficiency.
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Excalibur (USA): $110,000. Accuracy has dropped to 6% due to Russian 'jammers.'
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Skydio (USA): $25,000. Beautiful selfie video, but complete helplessness against electronic warfare.
The story of Helsing is a verdict on the Western 'PowerPoint-Military Industrial Complex'. While Spotify investors try to sell us a premium subscription for war, we are winning it with ordinary blue duct tape, real analysis of war experience, and its rapid implementation into reality and the ingenuity that is inherent to us. Well, how could we do without it?